The Most Random Day Ever
by Teliko. x3
Summary: The most random day in XFiles history! XD [[FanFic wrote in class w Miranda.]]


**The Most Random Day Ever**

**Rating: Teen**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing!**

**Summary: The most random day in X-Files history!**

**A/N: This is what Miranda and I come up with when we have a whole free class period to ourselves. LMFAO. Yes. This is all our idea. Total randomness. I'll explain at the end of the story.**

* * *

Scully walked into the office one morning, searching everywhere for something she had left there the day before. Mulder watched her with fascination before he finally spoke up.

"Need some help?"

"Have you seen my purse?"

"You have a purse?" She blew her bangs out of her eyes and nodded her head. "I haven't seen you carry a purse a day in your life."

"That doesn't mean I don't have one. And thanks for answering my question," She commented sarcastically.

"I'm sure it'll turn up sooner or later."

"But I need it," She whined.

"Why? What's so important that's in the purse?"

"It's... something you don't need to know about."

"If you tell me what it is, I'll tell you where your purse is."

"You just told me you've never seen me carry a purse a day in my life. How would you know what it looks like?" His face fell. "Ah huh... when you get that look of shock off of your face, can you PLEASE help me look for it?" Before he could answer her, she jogged out of the office in search of her purse. He rolled his eyes and pushed his chair back.

"WOMEN! When things are right in front of their face, they could turn around and say 'Where?' Psh." He leaned over and grabbed a small, black purse from underneath the desk. "I wonder what's in here that she needs so badly..." He unzipped her purse and peeked inside. His eyes widdened as he held up a...

"Mulder! What- what are you doing?" He jumped at her voice, but it was too late to hide what he had done. "Mulder..."

"I ugh... I think I found your purse." She hestitanly took a step towards him.

"Can... I have it?"

"Oh, sure... sure..." He handed her the purse and kept the object he had found in his hand, behind his back.

"Did you take anything out of here?!"

"No," was his instant reply.

"You little liar! Where's my tam-" She stomped her foot and crossed her arms. "Come on, Mulder! This isn't funny!"

"It is to me!"

"You aren't the one that has to BLEED every month!"

"You aren't the one that has to drive to work with TIGHT pants!" Her jaw dropped as he held up... the 'female' product. "I thought you couldn't have any more children."

"I just started 'it' about three months ago. I'm so used to not having one, that I forget about it some days. And..."

"Today was one of those days... eh?" Her face turned red from embarassment. "Don't be embarassed. I'm happy for you. You can have kids now. Isn't that what you've always wanted?" She nodded her head and walked up to the desk without any hesitation. She held out her hand and looked away as he placed it in her small hand.

-----

The next day...

Mulder and Scully walked into their office, bickering over some stupid stuff.

"Scully. Do you rather hairy legs or shaved?"

"Ew! Why are you asking me this!?"

"Because I can. Just humor me."

"...shaved."

"Okay. Honda or Chevy?"

"Honda."

"Small or big?"

"MULDER!"

"What? Small or big?" He pointed to his feet and smirked.

"I don't care!"

Doggett had walked into the room a few seconds after she answered. Mulder jumped up and pointed to him.

"Me or Doggett?"

"You." Doggett's jaw dropped as he silently walked out of the room.

"NIKE OR Reebok!?" She rolled her eyes and pushed past him to get to the desk.

-----

"Hey Scully? Have you ever been to New Orleans for Mardi Gras?"

"No. I can't say I have. Why?"

"Because! It's the best holiday... ever."

"What do you know about Mardi Gras, Mulder?"

"Well... I know the three main colors are purple, gold, and green."

"Is that it?"

"No! I know... that... people get drunk and suddenly, the worst high school band sounds like Earth, Wind, and Fire." She let out a laugh and shook her head. "You'd like it, Scully! I think we need to go down there. Actually, it's in a few days."

"I doubt Skinner would approve of our little vacation."

"Well don't tell him it's a vacation. Tell him... it's... a X-File!"

"I've got an idea! How about you lie to him, get rejected, and then we can get back to work?!"

"Fine!"

She watched as he got up from his desk and made his way to the elevator.

_'What did I do!?'_

-----

"So what did he say?"

"He said sure." Her jaw dropped, for the second time that day.

"What?!"

"He said okay."

"You must be joking."

"No. I'm serious. He said it was completely okay to go and get drunk and catch beads all night and eat cake until you throw up and dance to the high school bands and-"

"Deep breaths, Mulder." He nodded and loosened his shoulders up. "How would we get there, anyways?"

"Say hello to my lito' friend." He held up two plain tickets and a hotel reciept.

"You didn't!"

"I did!"

"I can't believe you!"

"I can't believe you don't believe me!"

"STOP IT!"

"I can't stop it. Our flight leaves in... an hour!"

"MULDER!"

"Let's go!"

------

"Scully, wake up."

"Hmmp. What?"

"You were having a nightmare... or something close to it."

"Oh."

"You kept screaming?"

"Oh..."

"Yeah..." She blinked and suddenly grabbed her stomach. The same, annoying cramping was coming back to her. She bolted up in the chair and looked under the desk for her purse. She heard Mulder laugh and slowly lifted her head. "Looking for..." He held up her purse. "this?"

* * *

**A/N: Right. So I said I would explain it, right? Okay. Well school was boring and my best friend, Miranda who's also obsessed with The X-Files, and I were sitting in our last class of the day. And there was like... no teacher there. We don't know why, but no one felt like going report it to the office. So we stayed without a teacher for one hour and thirty minutes. LOL!**

**So while Dany, Kayson, and Zack went around the classroom asking stupid questions like, 'Who's sexier? Dany or Zack?' We kinda got this idea. And THEN! Oh my god. At lunch, some random chick walked up to me and asked me if I had a tampon she could use. ROFL. I was like, 'Ugh... no.' LOL!!**

**Yes. My school days are hellacrazy. Gotta love class of 2010!! XD**


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